


Sitting on a Bench

by Homo_Vulcanensis



Series: The Green and the Yellow [4]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Finding Oneself, M/M, Post-TMP, gender discussion, trans!Kirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:53:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29108856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Homo_Vulcanensis/pseuds/Homo_Vulcanensis
Summary: Spock and Kirk have a discussion on gender. That's pretty much all that's happening here.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Spock
Series: The Green and the Yellow [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2072271
Kudos: 24





	Sitting on a Bench

**Author's Note:**

> I have alluded to this matter in other stories, but I thought I should elaborate. So, here you go.

Human and Vulcan were sitting on a bench somewhere on the promenade, overlooking the San Francisco bay. It was early evening in even earlier summer, and both were sipping from juice boxes they had acquired earlier. While Spock had managed to secure the last box of _sash-sava_ juice the vending machine had stocked, Kirk had decided on somewhat less exotic apple juice. There were some surfers on the waves in a relative distance from them, and both enjoyed watching the colorful sails swing in the wind, but neither particularly wished to join them. While Kirk was secretly scared of the depths of the ocean, Spock just didn’t like the thought of the water entering him through every crevice, as contaminated by micro-plastics as it still was, even in the 22nd century. And so, they were just sitting and watching, enjoying the sun warming them after a long day of work in climate-controlled rooms.

“How was work?”, Kirk asked after a long while. Spock turned his head to look at him. “The usual. The cadets are very eager to leave for the summer pause.” Kirk laughed. “Who isn’t. But that’s not exactly what I meant. You have something on your mind, I can feel it from here.”, he insisted. Spock looked at the ground. Some children had drawn what was probably themselves there, using old-timey chalk sticks. One of them was an Andorian, it seemed. “It is nothing of great importance.”, Spock said. In the last few weeks, his hormone levels had slowly creeped upwards, and he now found it difficult to speak about himself in any way. It somehow felt inappropriate. “I want to hear it anyway.”, Kirk replied, sliding a little nearer to his bondmate.

“Lieutenant Siddar has visited the collegium today, bringing with him his infant.”, Spock opened. “Yes?”, Kirk asked. “As we are not close, I was not aware that the child’s mother is a Vulcan.”, Spock continued. “So, it’s a half-Vulcan, like you?”, Kirk asked excitedly. “Indeed. While quite interesting on its own, this is not why am in thought. Siddar continued to introduce the child to us as a ‘girl’. I must say that I was slightly confused for a moment.”, Spock said. “Why is that?”, Kirk wondered. “Vulcan children do not have what Humans may call ‘gender’. They are children, this is their societal role.”, Spock explained. Kirk was silent for a moment.

“The Human system is quite constricting. Even now, I do not entirely understand its purpose.”, Spock said into the silence. Kirk snorted. “Tell me about it.”, he said. “I believe I am.”, Spock replied, willing to engage in some light-hearted banter. Kirk smiled at him. “I believe I understand what your problem is. You are not so sure anymore if _‘male’_ is actually what describes you best.”, he concluded. Spock nodded. “It is not that I oppose to the notion. By the Human definition, I am a man. But…” “But?”, Kirk wanted to know. “But I am not merely a Human.”, Spock ended. “You are a Vulcan too.”, Kirk filled in the blank. Spock nodded.

“Is there a concept that you think would feel more correct?”, Kirk wondered. “You are the only one that has a right to say who you are. That pertains gender too. I mean, look at me.”, he added, pointing to the place his hormone implant sat. “I do not think of myself as female either.”, Spock said and shook his head. “You don’t need to be anything. Think of Captain Harroway, everybody calls them _‘they’_.”, Kirk said. “Indeed.”, Spock said and pondered that idea.

“How do I know which label is correct?”, Spock wondered after a while. Kirk smiled apologetic. “I really don’t know. I think it’s different for everybody. I, for example, just knew. There wasn’t any moment of realization as far as I remember. With my sexual orientation however…”, Kirk said, never bothering to end his last sentence, lightly laughing at his teenage self. “I see.”, Spock replied nonetheless. “There are people that identify themselves as male and nonbinary at the same time. Does this fit you?”, Kirk said, trying to come up with more ideas.

“Jim, I think this is going too far.”, Spock said, taking a sip from his almost abandoned juice. “I believe I have already found a solution to my dilemma.” “Oh?”, Kirk wondered. “As you know, what might be considered gender in Vulcan culture is dependent on the situation. Had I wed T’Pring, I would have been considered something different than before, or even with you now.” “A strange thought, really. I see with you are so alienated.”, Kirk commented. Spock nodded yet again. “And as Vulcan gender is dependent on the situation, it would make me a male in the Human sense again. I have the associated body; I am living on Earth and many of my social interactions are with Humans. This is my situation.”, Spock explained. “Sounds logical. But are you sure you are okay with it?”, Kirk asked. “I am, Jim. As I am of both and neither species, I believe this is the best solution.”, Spock said. Kirk nodded. “But if you ever change your mind…”, he added. “I will be sure to tell you.”, Spock replied and extended two fingers towards his bondmate. Kirk smiled and copied the gesture.


End file.
